I hate social distancing.
I hate that I don’t get to see my friends who always provide the much-needed break from the everyday working parent grind.
I hate that my kids are not going to school, something they loved and helped them thrive.
I hate that I have been trying to get medical treatment for something that I am struggling with but can’t because it is not COVID-19 or immediately life-threatening.
I hate all the judgment that I see on social media. Constant posts about how people are not approving of others. How an honest ask from a scared mom about if it is OK for her child to play with a friend who is also self-quarantined can get over 300 comments berating her for even asking such a “stupid” questions (this question is not stupid … we are all learning here!)
What I hate the most is that almost everything as we know it is different. The little things that I used to take for granted, like taking the kids to a playground on a beautiful day or meeting a friend for a cup of coffee, are not options. A handshake when you meet a new neighbor or a hug when you want to let someone know you care.
I hate that we are not sure when this will end, before or when (or if) our lives will be able to go back to normal.
I hate that I am not sure what normal will be anymore??
With all of this being said, there are some things that I really love.
I love that we get to have family dinners every night because we are not combating with work schedules and social events in the evening. We have spent time talking with each other and with our kids. Time that would otherwise be spent trying to cram more things into an already busy day.
I love that I don’t feel as guilty taking “me time” away from my kids when I can, because right now, they are around all the time!! (literally, ALL THE TIME!!).
For every post that I have seen followed by judgment and negativity, I have seen posts meant to impart hope and laughter into the situation. Posts where people are supportive and helpful for each other, coming together to help those who need to be lifted up during this time.
So while I, along with everyone else, am hoping that we are able to get back to “normal” as soon as possible, am also trying to focus on what I actually enjoy during this time. To think about some of the things I want to continue to emphasize on when we are able to get back some of what we have lost.
As I always say, how we feel about something is always a response to our perspective, so why not choose to center on the positive?
Jmore parenting columnist Talya Knable is a psychotherapist who lives in Lutherville with her husband, Stephen, and their two children, Jack and Leigh. Her website is tkpsych.com/. She is also the assistant clinical director of Shalom Tikvah (shalomtikvah.org/), a local non-profit organization that supports Jewish families facing mental illness and other challenging life circumstances.