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Many of you may not be aware that this is “National Eating Disorder Awareness Week.” But if you have been following me for any stretch of time, you know how passionate I am about this topic (remember my blog post from a couple of weeks ago?).

So while this is a “parenting blog” and not an “eating disorder support blog,” I did not want to miss this opportunity to share with you the importance of a healthy relationship with food and your body. This is hot topic these days and one that affects all of us in some way or another. After all, we all have to eat, don’t we?!

And as parents, it does apply. We need to make sure we are in tune with our own views around food and body image, as this will undoubtedly affect that of our children.

As a result of that blog post I linked above (and will link again here if you missed it!) I have gotten into a lot of conversations with family and friends about “healthy lifestyles.” What does that mean? How do we achieve it? And how do we do so without risking those dreaded eating disorders I keep talking about?

While I am first to admit I am not a medical doctor, registered dietitian nutritionist or otherwise qualified to be the “expert” of healthy lifestyles, I do believe that we all need to take a step back when we answer that question. I was at dinner the other night and a friend asked what I thought about the vegan lifestyle. Instantly, I felt like it was a loaded question.

Was she asking me because she was a vegan (we had not ordered dinner yet) or considering this journey? Did she have an idea in mind that she was hoping I would confirm for her?

I was not sure. So, I answered cautiously, but offered this insight. When it comes to what we choose to put into our bodies, behave with our body or how you challenge your body physically, the decision is very personal. Everyone has the right to make these choices for themselves.

With that being said, anything that is majorly restrictive needs to come with a good reason. That reason could be personal beliefs, allergies and/or medical reasons, or true certainty that it actually makes you feel better. What the reason should never include is judgment that any lifestyle is “wrong”.” Labeling certain foods as “good” or “bad” has long-term consequences, not only to ourselves and our relationship with food, but to those around us.

I came across this point on Instagram the other day that sums up the point I wanted to make to my friend way better than I was able to articulate it, so I want to share it with you all. It was a post by body positive style blogger @theshirarose, who is a fellow eating disorder therapist based out of NYC/Brooklyn, and is open on social media about her own personal recovery from an eating disorder.

“Yes, food lights up our pleasure centers just like drugs. But you know what else lights up those same pleasure centers? Hugs + holding babies and I’m pretty sure no one would say we’re addicted to hugs or holding babies, would they? Not only that, but the studies that ‘prove’ sugar is addictive were done on rats that were restricted of food. Of course the rats exhibited signs of ‘addiction’ because they were starved. We know that restriction leads us to feel out of control around food and causes us to feel ‘addicted.’ It’s our body’s way of protecting us and not a character flaw or weakness. Allowing ourselves unconditional permission to eat the foods we want is a great way to cultivate a positive relationship with food. Sugar is not poison. It doesn’t have special powers. It’s just one of the many sources of energy that tastes delicious. Let’s allow ourselves to experience pleasure from eating!”

While this post was specifically a reaction to this “sugar is poison” claim, the same philosophy needs to apply beyond that. We need to allow ourselves to eat what we want and what our bodies crave, without judgment from ourselves or anyone else!

And as I finish my soapbox rant on the benefits of having a positive relationship with food (for today at least!) I wanted to leave you with this information about “How to Get your Kids to Eat Healthy Foods” …. since this is a parenting blog after all!

Talya Knable, psychotherapist and Jmore parenting columnist, stands in her Lutherville home. (Photo by Steve Ruark)
(Photo by Steve Ruark)

Jmore parenting columnist Talya Knable is a psychotherapist who lives in Lutherville with her husband, Stephen, and their two children, Jack and Leigh. Her website is tkpsych.com/. She is also the assistant clinical director of Shalom Tikvah (shalomtikvah.org/), a local non-profit organization that supports Jewish families facing mental illness and other challenging life circumstances.

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